Dear parent, please forgive me

Dear parent, please forgive me

I am trying to think what I need to buy for dinner tonight. I don’t need to hear your child screaming in my ear and shouting at you. Is the supermarket really the place to bring your child when they are like that?
Dear parent of THAT child…I am sorry I judged you. I am you now and it is tough. I had no right to look down on you or think wrong of you or your child. Please forgive me.

Oh really? I nearly knocked your child down in the middle of the road! Could you not keep a closer eye on them? Or even better teach them road sense!
Dear parent of THAT child…I now understand completely! One second was all it took! And you told them so often and yet they still did it. It just isn’t alway possible to hold them every single minute of every day. I went off at you that day. I am sorry. Please forgive me. And please look out for my child when you are driving too.

There is NO way I would let a child that age have a dummy in their mouth! That is appalling! It is so bad for their speech, their teeth and it looks terrible!
Did I seriously think that? Gosh I was so ignorant! Dear parent, I am sorry I judged you without thinking. I am now THAT parent with a seven year old clinging to dear life for his ‘dum dum’. I get it now! Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do and ignore others. I have no idea what battles your child was facing or what was causing them to need comfort that day. Who was I to judge? I am now back in that baby aisle with a child three quarters of my height and thinking of you.

Why would you put a child as old as that in a buggy when they should be walking! Honestly some parents are just so lazy and do anything for an easy life!
Someone should have slapped me! I am now THAT parent of a much older child who has only in the last year moved from a disability buggy to a wheelchair. I am still pushing him and I am sure many people think of me now as a lazy parent! If only they knew. If only I had known all those years ago!

I wasn’t nasty before I had children. But looking back I was judgemental. I knew about parenting. I was aware of disabilities.

But I was not living it.

I never knew that pain when you feel the world is staring at you in a supermarket because your child decides to have a hissy fit because you said no. I never knew that shock and adrenalin rush when you suddenly see a car approach your child who has wandered into the middle of the road and your heart misses a beat. I had idealistic views of children and the stages they should go through.

Dear parents, please forgive me.

I am now you. And this is harder than I ever thought it would be. I salute you. And I hope you forgive me.

From a parent who once looked down on you.

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9 thoughts on “Dear parent, please forgive me

  1. Fab blog, and we never get used to being judged, it hurts as much every single time. Probably because it’s rarely said directly to us so it’s almost impossible to defend ourselves from it. Yet you’re right, years before we were “that” sort of parent we probably judged others in exactly the same way without even realising how the “drip drip” of stares and tuts whenever we go out just slowly erode any sense of confidence or self-esteem we possess. Thank you for writing it, I’ll share with pleasure. Take care, Yvonne xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I can remember thinking what is that parent doing out with a small child after 9pm at night? …. then I came a parent myself and found myself picking up my son from the childminder at gone 10pm as I finished work at 9.45pm.
    Four years later my daughter was born and she would not sleep easily so I used to walk around the block with her in the pushchair at 3am hoping she would fall asleep or one memorable night I took her to Tesco after 12 midnight. If you have to be awake you might as well make it worthwhile.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: Dear parent, please forgive me | faithmummy

  4. I can so relate ot this, I am embarrassed to say that I was one of those juddgemental people because I was ignorant to everything. and now Im the Mummy with the children that people often judge. I am glad that I have been able to experience special Needs so I have stopped being that narrow minded person!

    Liked by 1 person

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