My name is Isaac


My name is Isaac.

Please don’t be scared of me. Please don’t laugh at me. Please don’t ignore me.

I don’t bite. (well I do sometimes but let’s not talk about that eh)

They annoyed me, ok. And I liked the feel of it. But I won’t bite you just for saying ‘Hi’. Well not today anyway!

I am happy today. So you’ll be fine. So say ‘Hi’ to me. I might not look at you but I know if you are smiling. That takes skill that does.

I know when people are scared of me. I know when they are laughing at me and ignoring me.

I look like I am in my own world, flapping, screaming, making noises, walking up and down in straight lines. These things are great fun. But I know you are there.

I’m not blind..well technically I am in one eye but you know what I mean! I can still tell if you like me. I’m autistic, not stupid.

I won’t swear at you or be cheeky to you…I am non verbal anyway.

I like attention. But not the attention most people give to me. Laugh with me, not at me please.

I like licking things. OK, I love things in my mouth. Anything. Food, cardboard, plastic, wood, a dummy. Licking tables, chairs, clothes, windows. I’m different. But you are different to me too. And I don’t laugh at you…well sometimes I do but I do it in the middle of the night when no-one knows what I am thinking about. I laugh good and hard then. Roll about the bed laughing. Your sameness is hilarious to me.

I love my sister. She is a right fussy eater but it’s great. I’ve trained her to leave as many leftovers for me as she can. I’ve worked out that dad likes a cup of coffee before clearing the dinner table. I’m doing him a service really by eating all that food before it goes in the bin. Saves me raking in the bin for it later anyway. It’s kind of like my way of washing the dishes. Mum never let’s me do it when we go out though. Wish I knew why.

My sister is funny. She puts toys on the floor and talks to them and stuff. I keep showing her that you lick them and scan them and chew them but she keeps lining them up and moving them about and cuddling them. She even gets these funny ones and puts them all together like to make some picture thing. Like 20 pieces of cardboard. What a waste of good chewing material that is. I ate a few. That soon stopped her. She’ll get them back soon enough. Did you know stuff comes back out you? Quite smart that!

You know what though I love winding her up. She loves this mad thing on TV. “Topsy and Tim” I think she callls it. Rants about it all day. TV is only good if it’s about food. Or something red like Elmo. Everything else is just mumbo jumbo. So I sit in my ball pool full of plastic food. And when I hear that theme tune I rummage and rummage and rummage. Oh that’s a great noise that. Drives her nuts. Makes me laugh. Mum tells her I don’t know any better. Oh I love that mum thing.

That mum thing. Well she is just the best. I raid the fridge, she opens the stuff for me. OK, so I have to look at her and look cute and all that and she says that thing that she keeps saying “Isaac, open”. That just means I get to have it. See you know what to do mum so why ask me? I give her a picture, she gives me the food. Hey, this woman is the bizz. She totally gets me. I have her sussed. I cry, she cuddles me. I pull my top off and scream long enough she gives me that fab red jumper thing I love. She makes that car thing go too. She turns that hard, cold food I eat out of that freezer thing into something even better. She cuddles me. Even when I’ve screamed at her. I’ve even bit her…just to see if she tasted as good as she seems. I’ll stick to licking her and pulling hair though. and pushing against her. She always says my name when I do things like that. That must mean she loves it the same as I do. She can even make that ipad thing work. How amazing is that!

She’s great to wind up too. My favourite game is watching her run down the street after me. She loves that. Well she picks me up and takes me back home so I think she wants me to do it again and again. I’m helping her exercise. I think she has had enough sometimes though so to help her out most days I just lie on the ground and scream instead of walking. I don’t get why people walk when those things with wheels can take you.

Those things are fabulous. But why do they stop? And why would they go backwards? That is just crazy. You get in, chew that belt thing, go where I want and just keep moving. Simple. I make it easy by telling you when you are not doing it right. Listen to me screaming. I’m telling you to keep moving and go the other way. You know the way that guy does in that blue car thing I go in. The one I go in with my bag and red jumper on?They take me to the right place every time. I have them trained. I’m still working on dad. He’ll learn one day.

You know I want to go to that place. With Sonia and Tricia. Where they feed me, let me go outside, take me swimming, give me an ipad to lick and play with, let me climb on thier soft play. That’s a great place that. The red jumper place. I chew my red jumper thingy so they know it’s mine. It’s so comfy and nice and warm and…tasty really. They make good dinners there. And I know what is happening. I am happy there. I don’t bite there. They talk to me there. They accept me.

I wish you would talk to me. Touch me. Play with me. Blow me some bubbles. Chase me down the street. Flap with me, make that ipad thingy go for me. Give me food. Put that red jumper thing on me all the time. Help me take these shoe things off. They irritate me. Why do you all wear them anyway? Let me turn your taps on, splash with me. laugh with me.

Smile at me. Say my name. Don’t be scared.

I’m only Isaac.



7 thoughts on “My name is Isaac

  1. Another amazing blog Miriam and extremely thought provoking about who us ‘normal’ people are, and what actually is ‘normal’. You’re blessed with a lovely family with lots of love between you all. I was telling Sandra just after our last shoot how clear the love you all have for each other is, that’s priceless! And I’m honoured that you used my images for this blog too!


  2. Beautiful Isaac you are one very lucky boy to have Miriam for a mummy, I wouldn’t pass you by without smiling and saying hello little man…how could anyone ignore that lovely little face.xxxxxx


  3. Isaac likes to run up and down, but you never see him frown, as the stairs is a favourite toy, giving him so much joy,. the garden is another retreat, stumbling but staying on his feet, as he races to and fro, then decide it is time to go,


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